life ...can really suck:
puzzled ... standing in a daze,
your body petrified with fear,
not knowing where you should go or hide,
without the enemy standing near.
you feel youâ ™re never trusted,
like someoneâ ™s watching all the time,
you never really are alone,
like youâ ™ve commited some kind of hainous crime,
your life is dead and going nowhere,
or just so you surely think,
you just have no motivation whatsoever,
so you sit in the dark alone and drink.
you try to drown your tears of sorrow,
in your shaky drunken hands,
wondering what will come up next,
but your thoughts just come up bland.
you think you dont owe anything to this world,
fine. this is the life you chose to live,
you wont listen to a single soul,
because you think they have nothing good to give,
sitting by yourself in solitude,
or when youâ ™re just pacing in your room,
with the same pensive expression on your face,
the same old thoughts of suicide and doom.
well if you want to look at it with emotional, its pretty good. sounds like you're spilling out ur guts there with ur emotions.
i say 8/10
not bad (:
are you trying to patronize the drunken suicidalist? I'm not saying I disagree with you, but that's the feeling it seemed to give
9.5/10!
that was so amazing,
it's pretty much my life story.
how can a stranger describe you to a t, and not know a single thing about you, that was simply amazing.
google it.
lmao jk. good.
dang that's like one of the best poems i've ever read. usually i don't have much of an eye for poetry but this...this is really deep. i was thinking while i was reading it "this would make a totally awesome song!" can you write a song for it??? PLEASSE!!!
Neutral on this one, a lot of white noise...hard to pinpoint on great lines, but the overall feel is sad and brooding. You are angry and young. It looks like you are 18 so I would say get out of the house and do something if you know what I mean. I do admire your spirit and vivacious soul...I demand you send me another poem.
f u c k i n amazin darlin!!!
seriously - try enter it at poetry.com - its a free competition - i put 1 ov mine in n it won editors choice award!
go 4 it mate!
oh my gosh.... this poem was beautiful... amazing... you put so much into this -- and it turned out great. "is this poem good?" you should be saying is this poem "great" because it is.
GREAT JOB!!!!!!!!!!
I think it's pretty good.
Some stanza's are amazing where other's are not so good.
With some work I think it would be quite good.
Nice work:)
wow i bet if u read that and i could hear it it woudl sound even more compeling! honestly it didnt flow in some aresas but in ur advantage it was very thought provoking and also so visual i could picture it!
and im sure it flows perfectly if i could hear it haha so
shhhhhweeeeet
hell its hecka better than my ****! :D
it's kinda too long
Interesting
Yes. It's an amazing poem. Thanks for your response!
Aww... thats so good i could never write something like that.
I liked the part who when she was cutting herself and then realized she regrets it
OMG that's really deep I am literally crying right now this is so good
its a very beautiful poem, long, but i like it. it's like i feel i can relate to alot of things your saying in it like pieced of my life you know? very good
 Allergies.. no relief?!?
 Religion in the workplace? |